Scared of being thin?

August 29, 2009

One of my old client weighed over 110 kilos. She hated it. She worked hard to lose the weight, and did. Yet every time she dropped to around 90kg, she suddenly rebounded and put all the weight back on. She did this several times, causing much frustration, anger, confusion and sadness.

It wasn’t utill a chance comment that we discovered the problem. Whenever she was approaching the 90 kg mark, her body fat had dropped to a level where her natural curves and muscles were beginning to show through. Because of that, she had to change her clothes and with the change of clothes came a very big change of looks.

This was all superb for her. Everyone around her was excited for her and complimented her on how good she looked. Including strange men.

And that was the problem, suddenly she was attracting a whole bunch of unwanted attention. And she only had one method to deal with and respond to that unwanted attention: Put the weight back on!

Once we realised this was the case, she quickly learnt new ways to deal with the unwanted attention, and next time she went through that 90kg mark and last I heard has kept it off.

This is just one of  many examples of how someone might be scared of being thin.

They don’t mean to be scared and they often they don’t even realise that this is a major factor in stopping them from losing the weight.

If you’re overweight, you interact with the world in a very different way than if you’re thin. And if you’ve been overweight for a long time, there is more things that you need to learn. Things that no one else can teach you.


There is a rule of thumb that states: 80% of the result comes from 20% of the effort.

The problem with this is that we never know what that highly effective 20% is. So, I’ve given this rule a slight shift when it comes to dieting: Focus on eating right for 80% of the time and the other 20% will take care of itself.

Very few can stick to a rigid diet long term (and all of those that can are elite sports professionals – never someone wanting to lose weight). Every one else ‘slips’ sometime. Maybe it’s a chocolate bar, lunch out, or something else.

Some people, after dieting for a week give up after one slip. This is silly. We all fail – we’re human. One slip on a diet doesn’t mean the diet will fail or that we’ll fail. Just means there was one slip.

Hence my 80/20 diet rule: As long as you can keep your diet 80% of the time, the other 20% will take care of itself.

TV dinners are a fantastic invention. It made the creation of dinner in a hectic lifestyle easy. It was a quick and easy way to create a somewhat healthy meal.

It did have a few unwanted side effects. One unwanted and usually unrecognized side effect of eating dinner in front of the TV (or internet), is that you’re not attending to what you’re eating.

What this means is you notice the messages from your body that you’re full much later. It means that you often shovel the food into your mouth, chew a few times then swallow, quickly filling your mouth again. You might have had the experience with a packet of chips while you watch a movie. Happily munching away only to suddenly notice the packet is empty.

If you’re part of the Butterfly Transformation Program you’ll know how to eat anything you want, as long as you make it a constant conscious choice.

One added side effect of doing this, is that you notice how the foods you eat actually taste, and your choice of foods changes naturally as a result.

I taught this method to a client last year. She was a big fan of a particular doughnut, eating several each day. She told me she was addicted, needing one in the morning, one after lunch, one before dinner and sometimes one before bed. She boldly told me once she smelled one, she had to have one.

Then I taught her how to eat consciously and got her to sit and eat one consciously. After two bites she was struggling and by halfway, she couldn’t finish it. “Way too sweet” was her comment.

One of the first steps of eating consciously is to not multi task. No eating unless your full attention is on the food; how it tastes, the texture and how every mouthful you swallow makes you feel.

One size fits all!

August 1, 2009

Have a look at the diet books, visit a gym, or just scan your local ads. You’ll notice that every single one of them offers a ‘one size fits all’ solution to your problem.

From the diet books, it’s a straight X number of calories per day by making these fantastic, tasty and healthy meals.

From the gym it’s an specific exercise regime that’ll get you fit and thin.

From any of the other ads, it’s not so much about you and your problems, but how their solution can fix your problems.

No one knows you better than yourself. Only you can know the best way to achieve the goals you want. You can get help from the diet books, gym and others, but only if you really know what you want. This relates to my last post and you being the only one that can make the change.

Of course, this now begs the question: How do I know what I want?

It’s a tough question to answer without knowing you, but there is a large portion of the Butterfly Transformation Program that focuses on helping you build, understand and discover the goals that are best for you.

P.S. Apologies for the pun in the title.